7. She

I once happened to witness a land
where people flew up to the Sun
A land where houses had no windows,
Horses had no reigns
I pondered about this impossibility of reason
A doctrine so precise -
And I felt the land beckoned to me
I feared , for I was naive
All in me was vice!
But the lust in me conquered
And I left my steps astray
Then saturation was obtained
Of tranquility and calm.
Hazardous mind stopped its rampant overture
An adjective of definition does not exist -
to compare my cleansation
I wondered what struck me
I thought which fairyland could ever touch my aura
Till i realised I entered your heart!!

Me - Why did you go alone to the rave without telling me? I would have taken myself to a downer party - Devdas ishtyle.

Her - I seriously don't know. The wind carried me and many faces invited me. Happy, sad & mad!

Me - Ha, that's ok then. The wind is a bastard. I knew it could not have been you.

Her - It is so funny. You now look upside down.

Me - Upside down is psy enough isn't it?

Her - Yeah! Whatever dude. The rivers I swam in were beautiful. Too bad they don't let goats swim in them.

Me - Am I a goat?

Her - Ask yourself. How am I supposed to know?

Me - Thats the point. I thought you were supposed to.

Her - I told you it was the wind.

Me - Yeah! How could I forget (*smile*).

Her - So, if you're done with your scream now, what else's up?

Me - Well, the colours in the sky have just arrived. They have decided to dance themselves. They like my music. God knows what they'll draw!

Her - Something beautiful I'm sure. (*a little wicked smile*)

Me - I just hallucinated again.

Her - Whatever dude!

Me - I trip on the way you say that.

Her - Aye! smeenish - although there is no such word.

Me - Two retards are talking to each other.

Wait! Two? There's only me writing this shit!!



Sketch courtesy - Joey Waldon

6. It is what it may be if it could not be what it was meant to be!!

there you go, become a fundamental dildo!
seeping into lust and her wings
here you are facing light in your night
creation

what's become of my learning - erased
the snail crawls on my back
race your mind, oppose the clocks
fall away into your capture

million clicks of a burning flame
makes you scared - push away the blame
red is black and blue is grey
survival

what's become of my pride - mixed
dissolving with sugar
vomit the angels, revolve, rotate
drink the abortion

sniff the snail crawling into your ear
tell your brain to welcome the charade
what remorse will joy repair?
realisation

the dots connect and the milk becomes opaque
seeking its kill, its orgasm
membranes commute into their host
welcoming the snail's intent
together we can run away into urns of blood soothing the brain
the pixels befriend your eye and the genie sips on success

the host permits it - the snail practises disarray of the impulse
ridiculing the absolute becomes its existence
the flakes are the most alive, uniting and growing
bare skin is religion!

5. Lullaby

This one is about a farmer who is in the process of killing his whole family because of a pathetic drought. He has killed everyone except his son. He wants his son to be asleep when he kills him so he waits for the boy to sleep. This is about the thoughts in his mind at that juncture.

Son, we shall meet again
Among fields of crimson light.
Embrace the murky horizon,
And let the wind get tight
The storm of the passing nimbus
Shall get us to salvage pride
Please join me in this joyride!

Son, I do forget that
Your pain was all you possessed;
Its been ages since the drought has begun
Its been ages since you were caressed.
Balancing through the stride
I ask you these rules to abide
Please join me in this joyride!

Let the mirror reflect away all the venom
stung in by the nice and the vice.
Deeper than the lies you told, sharper than your head
Remember what i said!

4. United States of America (Underworld)

Soaked with volatile greed
Sucking off every ounce of pretence
Its a demoniacal allergy
An escape of the soul
The riddance of the agony within
The vow's bliss; lateral hierarchy
Horizon calls the blend towards it
With an anamalous magnetic attraction
The farce on the hand that serves thee
knows the poison devoid in him
Supressing wavelengths everyday!

3. The Samsara and the curse of the White Fairy

Flaming, speeding fire trail,
What do you ask of me?
Your moving streaks have made me pale.
What is lost is what i see...

Open the skies and suck me in
Make me rule or make me sin
For I'm weary of this mortal skin
As it cages me, enrages me
Unfolding dark tunnels of eerie screams
Fall out of the line because I need to
Remind her that what was perhaps was perhaps
The only thing that really was!

When one is stuck between the real and the unreal, what is the ideal thing to do? I would say that it is to get back to the most true feeling that you've had. But here the most true feeling is that hallucination. Her skin at two-finger reach. Her bright luminosity stopping my touch. What am I supposed to do when such complexities are intertwined? Why am I not asinine? Why am I not really dumb? Dumb enough to forget even before remembering. Its like this one compartment - one sector in my grey matter, that has been reserved. Never to be erased. Read only memory! Too bad punter - She spits on you. Go, cry to the streets and they'll slap you. Because that is what you probably deserve - to be ground to intellectual powder because you can neither dissolve nor be touched. Your fate is to exist for the rest of your life reading the word ALONE over and over again. It does not stop there. You'll be thrown senses that bring back your most vivid memories.

The white fairy adores her shimmering reflection on the lake front. She remembers the time she kissed the urchin. That was before discovering the taste of sugar. He warned her of the bitter repercussions but she flaunted the difference of opinion. He cried because he knew that the present was just a moment that was about to explode into vanity. She disagreed. She still does. He cried. He still does. She is now married to the Son of the Moonlord living in opulent bliss possessing everything she ever desired. He has been shunned. He can feel but does not exist anymore! He can see everything that he desired possessed by another being. Do you see him running on the streets laughing at almost nothing? Please laugh at him. He is his own amusement. His own recreation...

I clicked my lighter on. The dark room was a stranger to the orange spark. But I was no stranger to her. Her eyes rose from the horizon. With infinite poise in them as the dry biochemical in the pipe burnt to black ash. Was she supposed to blink? Was I supposed to kiss the almighty oneness? Were we ever supposed to tread that specific path that otherwise would have made only a trifling difference.

I can hear things. Who is doing this and why? I don't get the point. I hate free will because I use it as an excuse to cling on to my ultimate misery - loss, you see? Do you see? How can you? Its mine. Alas!

Carry the ceiling away. And force the ladder through. I want to climb into the skies of tranquility. To have the power to control, and more importantly create something on my own. (*Hearing things again*)


Picture courtesy : Shivlink Records (cover art for the VA - Samsara)

2. A Cry to my Pen

My impulses extend into your nerve as ink
My thoughts are these verses,
Mortal earth makes faces in a blink
Such are my doomed curses!
No seconds to stop, to halt, to think
Wage a battle against its forces.

Too much to ask and too much to give
I pray for death but want to live
I'm inside me and far beyond
Far enough to fathom a bond.

Against my will, against my pain
I dream aloud to remain sane
I greet the dead, celebrate the rain
Alas! my purpose - all in vain!

Note - This is a piece of text compiled to attract cognitive garbage with a goal to make the recycling of paper intellectually more effective.

1. Naughty Notes

If you are a happy person, please listen to me because I know you can. And start thinking aloud so I can hear you. I need to, because I have to climb on the vibes to get to where you are.

PS - Thank you for doing the above already!

Your thought has a solid roof. Built by contemporary society and its surrogate school of thoughts. At times, this solid roof is blown off by the storm of repulsion that your tired mind creates. Blown into this "boom", you free yourself from any form of desire because everything that you want comes right to you.

Hail Shiva!!!

Scribble pad, Undergrad.

You pretend that you know.
Not too sad but far from mad
Crack me - take me where you go!

The Crime

Does it count as a steal? When you can toy around with ten thousands thoughts in one nano-second but ultimately find your senses accelerating towards just one of them. Are you, the thief, benefiting from this crime? Or is it just a set of permutations your alter-ego seeps into? Or is it its own void of filling acceptance?

The Alibi

At all times, when we are - we are where we are when we are and not in another place we are not, are we? But then, we could travel paths within ourselves negating everything that seems to be real. Life in any of its forms takes you where you want to be and where you don't. I guess the real alibi would be to redefine life on your own idiotic terms.

The Judgment

I have not witnessed any supernatural event without a part of my own mind acknowledging the same as supernatural. So, even to acknowledge the supernatural or the divine instinct in my own mind, I have to feed my will. What do I need to feed it with? Everything outside me? Why then, does my guilt judge only my within? Why am I being sentenced for every crime before I can gather my alibis?

The Accused

Who am I? I am that clandestine part of everyone who reads these words which influenced me into thinking that my crime has left me no alibis in any of you and that I have to serve my punishment which is to be eternally content in the disparity of the world and the way it judges. Remembering that the world is me and I am the world.

I. Creation - I was drugged by God.

                  My parents consummated in their bliss of holy matrimony, which brought about a chemical reaction. An organism within the mother's womb was gifted with consciousness. That, which was nothing became that which is me. So i begin from where i began but where i began was merely an end of purity. I don't quite remember if i was ready for this magic trick. Or for this supreme overdose. Every action involving me that has happened or is going to, existed in some mind and hence I became complete. My birth became a necessity. It was no miracle contrary to popular belief. It was purely a requirement. While my finite forms floated in different dimensions of the cosmos and my infinite thoughts of the mind hid under the cover of non-existence, I was summoned by the power to be bound as one. 

                   As the liquid appeared out of a distant blackhole and started to form my shape, I was filled with excitement as I was about to venture out on a journey perceiving extensions of my own thought as separate entities. I was gearing up for "blindfolded mirror-wrestling". But the liquid managed to work its way through chaining my ego to a new component within me - perception. I was no longer infinite. I was made to unlearn as I was to learn again. I was taught as I was to teach. I was drugged with the most potent drug in the world - Deoxyribonucleic acid!

                    I was given mortal sight which is restricted to the seven colours, their mixture and their absence. I lost my power of transparent vision. And that of opacity. I wait for the time when i would have my vision back. The vision to look deep into space and watch every action shape a "big bang". Yes, every action is a big bang. So is every thought. Energy can be created. It can also be teleported. Actively or passively. I was given earthly audio. The sonic daily newspaper of space. If you listen to it carefully enough, you get all the news. About everything that happens everywhere. But I miss the lesser and higher sounds. I envy the bats and their lifestyle. Dark power with supersonic capabilities. UV vision for the lucky ones. They have the best parties on our planet! I was given the power of smell. There is nothing that truly smells. I was made to because i had to form my own matrix of likes and preferences. I was made to because lust or the lack of it had to be embedded in me. I was made to sense touch and as soon as that happened, I was physically chained to an illusion called gravity. I became one with this planet. I was given taste so that I don't end my life for the search of something bigger. So that I would survive here for the want of taste. 

                  Thus, God (including me) made me me, as I am now, to experience the subjective differences of the cosmic ego. I seek to shed this skin as this attempt serves as a worthy purpose for my existence. I wish to share my visions with anybody who may need to use them in their own path(s).

Brahma satyaṃ jagat mithyā, jīvo brahmaiva nāparah....